I watched Aftersun a while ago and loved it. But I never fully understood why. I've had an abusive family growing up and thought the movie helped show what the grief was like. So I thought.
I recently found out who my biological father is. It's very complicated and in the weeds, but we met a few times when I was a kid. He seemed really nice and I really liked him. I barely understood he was my real dad, but something deep within me felt safe and okay around him, like an intution. Due to my mother and a whole mess I never got to see him since I was 6.
But those few moments I had were hard to describe. It's hard to describe the emotion that come with a father you have a few moments with. A father you love and resonate with but remain obstructed and seperated from. The few moments where you feel peace and love that's paternal and true, and good. It was just a few moments that I never had the words for but Aftersun captured it perfectly.
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